Divorce is weird.
Sitting beside you is strange. My mind naturally wonders your body, imagining us naked. I can't hug you. I've learned that feeling you pressed against me drags me into the abyss, which is where you live. I can't live there anymore.
I tried. I truly tried. I crouched with you at the bottom of your well for so long. I hid with you, and I hid you from the light you didn't want against your skin. I took my time. You took my time. So much time.
But when I looked up and saw our girls, needing me, I couldn't stay. Their sweet, bright eyes, needing. I would've stayed forever. I loved you more than anyone but them. You understand.
I wanted to be close to you. You won't have closeness. Someone has to take care of them. And really, it's just an extension of the care I gave you. They're yours. They have hope, and a future, that you've refused for yourself.
I tried. I truly tried. I crouched with you at the bottom of your well for so long. I hid with you, and I hid you from the light you didn't want against your skin. I took my time. You took my time. So much time.
But when I looked up and saw our girls, needing me, I couldn't stay. Their sweet, bright eyes, needing. I would've stayed forever. I loved you more than anyone but them. You understand.
I wanted to be close to you. You won't have closeness. Someone has to take care of them. And really, it's just an extension of the care I gave you. They're yours. They have hope, and a future, that you've refused for yourself.
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